{The Father of mercies and God of all comfort}

Thursday, January 28, 2010


The last few days have been pretty chaotic. I hate chaos! I want peace and normality. I want a schedule and concrete plans. It drives me crazy to wait and I'm so glad Friday is almost here! I want calm.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010


So I apologized to my roommate today! Her response was "okay, I'm sorry too." I'm not sure how I feel about it. I think I feel good about it and I definitely should.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

So...good talk

So, I sure know how to burn bridges. I've done my share of tearing down in my few years being a functioning human being. I know how to cause hurt, but sometimes I don't mean to. I would like to reconcile differences on many fronts and have done some reconciliation these last few months. I've turned hate to love for a person whom I hadn't spoken to in over a year and could not look at without getting upset. I'm taking it slow; facebook messages and then I'll work up enough courage to actually see them. Some friends of old have contacted me and healing has begun. Now if only I could put the fire out on this roommate bridge. I consciously disobeyed God the other night. He gave me the opportunity I had been praying about to talk to her and I turned my back and walked out. Literally. Then at church this morning our college minister was out of town, so his associate did the teaching. He was reading out of Acts chapter four and his words just grabbed me. He was talking about not just believing in Jesus, but living it out through our actions. Now I'm not a bad person, but I do some pretty wretched things at times. However, I love the Lord and worship only him. I strive to be the person who's prayers God hears in 1 Peter. I realized today that I definitely cannot love God completely if I do not find in him the love for my roommate. I have been thinking about this for a week or so, but it came full circle this morning and it was rough to hear. My heart hurts for all the people I've destroyed with my words and actions over the years and I want to be a woman of the Lord who lifts people up and shares the good news of Jesus.

"Burning Bridges"

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Longest 4 Day Week

I bought these dresses yesterday!

This week, only being four days, felt like an entire month. I am exhausted, yet exhilarated. I have so much to plan for and a lot to get busy on.
-Resume for teaching
-Teaching certificate programs
-Contact school districts to look for jobs
-Meet with reception site peeps
-Find a baker
-Meet with florist to finalize flowers
-Lots of research for class assignments
     This has to get done in the next two weeks. Besides the everlasting week I got to have dinner with the girls again. I love them a lot. They make me laugh so much. We ate at Chili's again. We need a new place to eat. I'm excited for their company as well as there beautiful faces. I have to watch a friends cat this weekend, I know odd. She is going out of town to meet her boyfriend's parents and she needs me to clean the cat box, GROSS. I know I'm an awesome friend; I like cats anyway.
     I work in a three's classroom at the child development center on campus and it's the most fun! I love the kids and the assistant teacher, the lead teacher is a lazy bum. It seems she's incapable of doing anything on her own. There are twins Elliot and Oliver who are adorable. Oliver and I are really good friends, and every morning Oliver tells me "I missed you." It's the sweetest thing and makes me love the class that much more! Children are my life. I cannot wait to get started.

Photo Of The Day
Ryan bought me these shoes like two years ago for my birthday.

This is what dinner looks like. Jamie makes crazy faces, Courtney's Mexican ;), Emily is the sweet quiet one, and then there's my awesome card tower. I love Fridays.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Winsome Wednesday

     I meet with a group of girls on Wednesdays for small group. They are truly amazing and full of love and laughter. I enjoy their company and ultimately there friendship that came easily. They love me and are concerned for the happenings in my life and pray for me. I'm so blessed to have found this group, even if I only get two semesters with them!
     I received two dictionaries for Christmas, I asked for them, and found the word winsome. It means charming, in a childlike or naive way. It's not always acceptable to use the term naive, but in the context of my life I don't mind being naive about some things. Thus, today is a winsome Wednesday that I was able to enjoy with good company along with lots of laughs and hugs.
     I am working on designing the save the date for the wedding and will have the final draft this weekend if all works out. I will be sending them out in a week or two. Super stoked.
Ryan voted and the winning cake is:

Without the flowers, peacock feathers instead, and a beautiful cake topper that we have not picked yet. 

Tuesday, January 19, 2010


Despite all of the obstacles and frustrations I've come across in the last year I am extremely happy today. I enjoy the feeling of elation. And for no reason. It's glorious, all because of our great God! He sets my heart at peace and quiets my spirit.
-Ryan is back in school
-his loan money processing
-my aggressions and anger gone
-money in the bank and a good job!
Did I mention God is so good?!
This weekend I was able to paint my dumpster table. The light in the living room sucks, but the table looks much better. I also got to spend the holiday Monday with Ryan. We went to our favorite Chinese restaurant and saw a movie. Sad day because I didn't bring my camera to document it.
BEFORE & AFTER                                                                   

Saturday, January 16, 2010


So I am sick, yet again. Who'd a thunk it? I didn't get the table done today, hopefully tomorrow. I need to get better before Tuesday otherwise I cannot work. Why me???

Photo Of The Day "Dinner with the girls"
It was after work, that's why we all look so alive and well rested.

An idea for bridesmaid necklaces:

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

I'm Indescisive As Usual

I have flowers, and flower back-ups, and a photographer, a reception site, still waiting on the church to give us the okay, bridesmaid dresses, ideas for reception and ceremony decorations, I need to dress the guys, and I need a cake!
I like:

The first one without the stupid daisies and bow with sugar anemones with the dark center like the second cake, just skinnier lines, and maybe much smaller anemones almost as small as the daisies. Definitely not as many anemones as daisies. The second cake I have no complaints except for the number of anemones. Less is more. The last cake Ryan likes, which is weird to me, but he doesn't want flowers on the cake, so I think the peacock feathers would look cool on it. We have to buy a somewhat traditional cake topper, by traditional I mean people. I'll find a cool one. The question is which cake looks better with the rest of the ideas.
My Bouquet: Anemones with dark center, peonies or white parrot tulips, and white mums.

The Bridesmaids:

Centerpieces and decorations: Some tables with goldfish, peacock feathers, and floral arrangements of craspedia and white mums. Also, white and yellow paper lanterns will adorn the ceiling and the dance floor.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Praise Him

Ryan is going back to school this semester! Praise God. He's very excited, he registered for classes today and is working on finances. I'm confident in the Lord that everything will come through. He's decided that if he gets the job with Exxon he'll take it, but finish this semester. I'm so thrilled for him to finally be able to move forward. Now I only have to look for work in two places. Piece of cake?

These last two days have been tiring; they could be worse. I started my new job at Piper CDC and I'm working in the three's classroom. It's all good in there, because they are self sufficient, their speech is developed and they can say things rather than bite as the one's do. I enjoy the teacher and the assistant teacher and I love my hours. I go to work at 7:30 and I'm done with work and class by 2:15 on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. On Tuesday and Thursday I go to work at 7:30 and I'm done for the day at 1:45. This will be a great last semester. If only I could figure out the roommate situation. I know what God wants me to do, but I'm looking for a way around it. In other words, I will inevitably do what God wants, but not like it very much. I have also started a workout routine for the week and will do my best to stay focused throughout the semester.

I want to paint my table this weekend, hopefully it won't be too cold.

Photo Of The Day
"Coco Chillin'"

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Take Off...

Ryan came to see me this weekend! YAY! We had some fun on Friday night with the good roommate and our friend from work. We played a lot of Little Big Planet and watched some movies. I thoroughly enjoyed having Ryan visit. I love it when he comes to Waco.

      This is the result of my TB skin test. I know gross, but this doctor declared it negative. Works for me!
      It's still about the same size after four days and it itches like crazy. No x-ray for me!

Ryan and I came home from DQ last night (we had coupons) we drove by the dumpster and I saw what looked like chair legs sticking out and I thought they were nice. So, we stopped and it turned out to be a table. It wasn't in terrible condition, but it's dirty. With a little sandpaper and paint it will look better. So, we got it out and brought it to the apartment. We're going to paint it black to match the rest of the apartment furnitiure and replace the glass on top. I think it was a find though.

A great weekend. Now I will retire early to prepare for the day tomorrow. I'm nervous to start this semester, it's weird.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

What did you say?

So we're still waiting to hear from A&M about ryan's school this semester. He applied for a job at Exxon in Baytown over the summer and was offered an interview! It's on January 25, our 6 year anniversary btw. There will probably be three or four rounds of interviews my dad said, so we won't know if he gets the job until about May. Both scenarios, school and this job, involve waiting which I do not do well. We were thinking if Ryan got the Exxon job we'd be able to live in Baytown, Crosby, or Houston and I could get a job nearby. No big deal. Come to find out the job is not in Baytown, but Beaumont. This freaked me out a little. Then I decided, we can start our lives in a new place and still be close to family and friends. Who knows what will happen, but there are so many options. Praise God for that!

And I just finished an entire semester's worth of curriculum for mother's day out. Glad that's done. School starts Monday; I'll try to enjoy my last semester!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Can I Please Push Pause?

 So I'm back in Waco. I was driving in last night and saw the skyline of lights and have never disliked the city so much. I just want to get married and graduate already!! I'm tired. I finally got everything upstairs and put away. My room is clean and it feels fantastic. I can now read in peace.I also rearranged, because I needed refreshing. I like it now!
If you walk into my bedroom and look left and pan to the right this is basically what it would look like. Most of the artwork courtesy of Emily Dupuis-Powell!

I went to the doctor today to get a TB skin test for my new job. The last time I got one of these it was positive. I had to take meds and get chest x-rays, it was crazy. Later I found out that my skin could have had a reaction to the solution, so I went in this morning and will go back on Friday to get it looked at. Hopefully I have no reaction! It would make my life easier. I got a lot done today. After the doctor I went to Wal-Mart for food and essentials, and then I went to Robinson Tower to turn in my I-9 for work. I came home cleaned and unpacked. I don't want the roommates to come back! I don't think I'm ready for that drama yet.

My obsession this week is the Twilight soundtrack. It's pretty sweet!

                                           AND NOW:
                                           The photo of the day
                                          " Coco, Duke, and Fred"

Monday, January 4, 2010


I am truly emotionally spent after yesterday's ordeal. I cried a lot and prayed a lot. This morning I woke up with no bitter feelings toward the girl and I'm so relieved. Now it's back to Waco tomorrow to face the music. God give me strength.

*Photo Of The Day*
Me, Austin, Ian, & Justin
Justin thought it would be funny to take Austin's video camera he got for Christmas and go "ghost hunting". A hilarious outing overall. This is our "ghost hunter" faces picture before we left.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Ugly Rant

I hate living with roommates! One of them is okay the other is a dirty whore I don't trust. Excuse me for saying that. I'm pretty sure her boyfriend beats her and I tried to express sentiments about certain things, cleaning the kitchen and her boyfriend and she took it the wrong way. Now she says she despises me. WTF?! I was not rude to her in my email, in fact I was overly polite for myself. I forwarded the email to our other roommate who saw no problem with it. Now the stupid girl wants phone communication with me. Why would I try to contact her if she is such a jerk? I don't understand people and I have to live with the ho for another semester?!! This will not go well; I can feel it. This is the second roommate in my college career that hates me and the first one hit MY car! I will not let this get to me and I will be disgustingly sweet to her to piss her off. All I really want to do is kick her out.

Photo Of The Day
"Awesome sky on New Year's Eve"

Saturday, January 2, 2010

The time is now

I am soooo glad it's a new year. This last one could have been worse I guess, but towards the end it was pretty rough. Ryan not being in school this semester really threw everyone, especially me. I've been talking to God a lot about it and he is just telling me to wait and it's killing me. So this year I will wait, "though it is painful", I will wait. God is good and he will provide; we're blessed so far! My resolutions, so small, but meaningful. 

1. Wait. This will possibly be the hardest thing, because of my anxiety and impatience. 
2. Have weekly meetings with people at school. I need their fellowship and friendship.
I feel that a new year will begin when Ryan and I get married, so I'll focus on these two things until then.

*First Pic of the New Year*

I spent New Year's Eve with Ryan and his fam. We had some dinner and watched t.v. Ryan and I went to Amanda and Kelly's and watched some wicked loud fireworks, much fun.